Last Meal

Hi. My name is Josie, and I’m a sugar addict. It has been one day since I ate sugar.

If you knew that today was your last day on earth, what would you eat? A lot of people focus on what they’d do on their last day, but, since this is a blog about overcoming food addiction, I want to know what you’d eat. Would you cook something at home? Go out to eat? Ask Great Aunt Helen to make you her famous turkey gravy and mashed potatoes?

A little melodramatic? How about if you weren’t going to eat sugar any more—in fact, let’s just say that you’re not going to eat sugar for the next year. A year without sugar. What would you eat then? A sinfully rich chocolate cake? Apple pie a la mode? A white chocolate lemony cheesecake? A Snickers bar with an ice-cold Coke? Would you go out to your favorite restaurants and order just from the dessert menu?

Now, what if you thought harder and realized that the majority of bread has sugar in it? Remember, you’re not eating any sugar. Would that change your food choices? Instead of guzzling chocolate milk and bingeing on Little Debbie snack cakes, would you grab a pizza instead? A hamburger? If you realized that Chinese food is loaded with sugar, would you swing by a Panda Express for some orange chicken? Most salad dressings have sugar in them—would you load up your first plate at the buffet with a huge salad smothered in raspberry vinaigrette and craisins?

My last day of sugar was far less spectacular than any of this. I’ve been sick the last three days and haven’t been able to follow through on my plan to eat all my favorites one last time. But, ever since I decided to do this blog, I have been bingeing on my white drug of choice, so I’ll stop complaining. In effect, I did the sugar equivalent of sitting myself down and making me smoke a whole pack of cigarettes in the hopes that I would get sick enough to never want to try it again. I’ve done this often enough that I know it won’t last, but at least for today, I’m just fine not eating any sugar.

I’m a sugar addict. It took me a long time to admit this to myself, even longer to say the words out loud to anyone else. “I’m a tough girl,” I kept thinking. “I can beat this. I can be moderate. I can be strong.” And I’d quit or eat less, and I’d last a few days before I was back to skipping the veggies and the fruit and the water in favor of a Twinkie or bowl of cookie dough.

So why is this time going to work? Because I’m drawing on the power of the community. I need help. I’m admitting it. I’m counting on you to be my SAA group (sugar addicts anonymous—except the anonymous part!) I need your prayers, your best wishes, your comments and encouragement. I’m hoping I can be a good example of a bad example and stop someone from following my same path. And I’m hoping that I can share some knowledge that will help others struggling with their own addictions or problems or difficulties. You may not be a sugar addict like me, but I’m pretty sure you have some bad habits you’re working hard to overcome. Maybe together, we can all improve.

2 thoughts on “Last Meal”

  1. Josie, You are one amazing woman. I admire & love you no end! I want to say , “You got this”….but I think that may just trivialize the HUGE effort it takes to do this. So, I’m wishing you the best, praying for you & cheering you on! I believe that you will succeed….but I don’t think it will be easy. You are good at not easy!

    Like

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